manipulation

Its strange how we get manipulated in the name of love, how some times our very close persons manipulate into doing things which we never should have.

We all know that ungratefulness is one of the worst component of human nature. Even a small school going child knows it. Even then, I have made that mistake knowingly only once, and after doing that I learnt two lessons, that one act of ungratefulness haunts a person through out his life, and we can be manipulated by people we love very much for all the wrong reasons. A bitter incident taught me two invaluable lessons.

I learnt these lessons in my teenage and remembered it ever since. I had a take-take relationship with my elder sister, who was always on the receiving end, I on the giving end. I used to dote on her, and she is one the best manipulators I have ever seen. I will give her 200 marks in 100.

I slaved for her for years thanklessly, It used to freak out almost everyone who used to see us together. But I was too dumb to realize that, and she was an expert in using people for her good.

One of her friends used to visit our home every day, he was a very jolly person, and very fond of both of us. One day, I don’t know what came over him, he criticized her bitterly for using me, well, my sister told him that as I am her sister, and he is her friend so he is forbidden to talk with me ever again, and ordered me the same.

At that age, we used to listen to our elders blindly (She was three years senior than me), so I obeyed her, he came to meet me while she was away and I dictated her order to him like a robot.

That is one decision which has stung me ever since, especially after knowing my sister’s nature and rejecting her.

I should have never done that, he was my well wisher, and it must have taken him a lot of courage to stand against a friend he cared for so much, he used to daily visit her no matter what, and he lost her friendship for that standing up, and the person who he stood up for turned out to be pretty ungrateful.

That incident taught me two lessons at eighteen years of age, one, never be ungrateful to any one who has done you some good, if you have to walk away, do it with grace, keeping in mind that he has been your benefactor.

You will kill a marvelous relationship, and no matter how much you try to find a scapegoat for that murder, you will never be able to blame any one but you. You may name some one as who misguided you, but the pinch will remain there.

And the second one is, no matter how much you love some one, never blindly act on his or her words. Always apply your own judgment and reasoning. Be guided by your own brain, heart and soul. Because its your life, you should make yourself capable of holding its helm. Stumbling, falling, and getting hurt occasionally does not makes you a failure. If you stand up and walk on your own again, every fall teaches you how strong you are. Its really painful to be manipulated by some one to do some thing which you would never have done. Its better to do the same thing by yourself, because in that case you will suffer the consequences with dignity, knowing that you reaped what you sowed.